Feel free to put on some atmospheric music and adopt a melodramatic tone of voice while reading the following passage.

A drama is like a boyfriend. When you're together, everything's all right. You
feel like you're in your own little world and everything outside of that bubble
is of little importance. Everyday, you're excited about seeing him. Sometimes
though, you've got to remember that the world doesn't revolve around him. You
can't neglect all of life's responsibilities. As much as you'd want to spend all
your time together, you've still got to study and concentrate at school.
Unfortunately, sometimes it won't work out. Eventually, you'll break up. He will
love you, then leave you. You'll cling on to all those memories, refusing to let
go of such a significant part of your life. Maybe you'll mope for a few days,
maybe a month. But in the end, time will erase the pain and you will find
someone else, you'll find another drama to devote your life to. Hence, a drama
is like a boyfriend.

City Hunter, I will miss you.

Here are some much clearer versions of some of the Hunger Games movie photos that EW just released. Josh Hutcherson does look really buff, doesn't he? Whereas Liam looks all tall and lanky. Ah well, Peeta IS supposed to have spent his whole life lugging sacks of flour everywhere, so I guess it makes sense.

First look at Josh Hutcherson as Peeta and Liam Hemsworth as Gale.

Judging from the phrase "Hunger Games Hotties", I would guess that they're trying to market it as a teen romance flick (which it so isn't). LOL that last one with the oh-so-glorious glory shot makes me want to laugh out loud. But they look okay I guess. Josh Hutcherson isn't so bad blond. I especially like the look he has in the second last picture. Plus, it's not looks that count. It's whether he can act or not, right?

My exact feelings right now can be communicated through the above picture. I just feel like putting my head to my desk and staying like that for the rest of the week. Or month.

This is the first time I've broken my "30-minute" rule that I've been following for the past three (has it only been three?) days. Literally all I've been doing it studying. I live, eat and breathe history. Fuck, I even started to dream about history last night. But I digress. I broke the rule because I really wanted to blog about my sad existence.

"The trials will be over by next week" has been my mantra over the past few days. It's what kept me going. After all, I can half kill myself trying to cram for the exams (5 essays and a few short answers within 4 and a half hours, over a two day period) and then just let it all go afterwards. I get a break between the trials and HSC after all. But today, my piano teacher just reminded me that my Musicianship 4th Grade exam is coming up next month and I have less than 3 weeks to prepare for it. And all those days of not revising my cadences and composers have finally caught up with me and now I need to spend my days re-reading stuff about fucking Bach, Handel, chord progressions and Baroque Suites. Hence the *headdesk* up the top.

It feels so self-defeating. Why do I do all this studying? Of course I want the marks but it's so PAINFUL to put myself through this everytime I get a Year 12 exam. Because I'm in year 11, I tend to feel like I have to overcompensate and make up for the disadvantage of doing the test one year early. Also, I'm starting to ask myself, what happens next? Danny mentioned something along these lines in his blog. About asking yourself what happens next and feeling purposeless. I feel the same right now. What happens after these trials? I have to start preparing for the Musicianship exam. What happens after the Musicianship exams? I start preparing for Year 11 Preliminary Exams. What happens after the Preliminary Exams? I start preparing for the HSC. Right now, the future looks so bleak and depressing :(

On a lighter note, although I feel like burning all my history textbooks and stuff, I also feel motivated to do some exercise. :O SHOCK! GASP! Oh yes, I did just say that. I WANT to do exercise. I don't know what brought this on though. Maybe after finding out Lee Min Ho's weight (which is extremely extremely light), I realised that I didn't want to become heavier than him. Cause that would be so weird. Or maybe Othilia has subconsciously influenced me to do more exercise through her health/fitness posts. Possibly a combination of the two.

Studying for modern is like trying to dig a tunnel to China with nothing more than a spoon. You can spend hours and hours scraping away at the dirt but after a week, all you have left is a small crater in your front yard and a really dirty spoon which you will never use to eat with again. This is exactly my situation. I have sat here from 7pm to 11pm this Monday, trying to study as much as possible and I've barely scraped the surface of the freakin' topic. I was aiming to battle "Conflict in Indochina" as well as "Russia and the Soviet Union" today but alas, all I've been able to do is dot point the main events of Indochina and give myself a ginormous headache. I thought I was doing okay. Until I read the exemplary responses of past papers. You'd think I would've learnt not to do that from last time. But anyway, I realised that I only know the surface of things. I know the basic basic facts but I've got no quotes, no statistics and no actual references to back up what I'm saying.

For example, I say

"The Tet Offensive was a tactical failure for the Viet Cong but was successful in the fact that it caused American attitudes to change back home."

But then to get a band 6, I am supposed to say,

"The Tet Offensive of January - February 1968, which involved a combined forced of 70 000 to 80 000 Viet Cong soldiers invading 9 cities and 30 provincial capitals, was a tactical failure for the Viet Cong but was successful in the fact that it caused American attitudes to change back home."

Do you understand my dilemma right now? And it's not like I can suddenly remember a billion statistics and quotes before the trial next Monday. Plus, knowing my luck, even if I try to remember some stuff, mostly likely it will not end up in the test.

PLUS, the section doesn't involve any multiple choice or short answer questions. It's just two extended response, 25 mark questions. (You get to pick which one you want to do though). And if by chance, neither of those two options appeal to you, then well, YOU ARE SO SCREWED.

Nancy LuuPoo, I have set a goal for both of us by the end of the year. WE MUST LEARN HOW TO DO THAT CHAIR MOVE FROM "GOODBYE BABY" BY MISS A. Okay? Okay. I don't care how many chairs or bones we need to break, we shall learn the dance!

I just came back from 1 and half hours of driving with my dad. Now that I don't have the Instructor-who-shall-not-be-named teaching me, I feel like I can actually start enjoying it. Well maybe that's going too far. I feel like I can bear with it, I should say. Driving is scary. It's like, you've got full control of the car. Every little action you do has the potential to cause some kind of accident. You might end up damaging someone else's car or driving into an oncoming vehicle. It's scary, I'm in some kind of paranoid state everything I drive. But my dad is worse. He sits there unable to brake or take control of the car. All he can do is say, "Slower! Slower! Slower! WATCH OUT!" and it's up to me to follow his commands. I feel like he's even more scared than me.

OH RIGHT I forgot to mention something else. Demi Lovato's new song "Skyscraper" is so beautiful. It makes me want to cry and laugh and cry and laugh. I can't stop listening to it LOL. I hope she has a new album coming out soon. I don't know what's happening with her life. Didn't she end up in rehab or something? I also heard she hit a girl LOL.

After watching City Hunter episode 17, my mind is full of many unfulfilled questions which I will outline in this post. Don't worry none of these are spoilerific.

• Why was Mr Prosecutor guy playing Jenga in a coffee shop? More importantly, where did he get this Jenga set? Is it a portable one which he manages to magically shrink and bring along with him to all his cases?


• Why was the President of Korea watching an American chick flick?


• How many cars does Lee Min Ho have? I must have counted at least 4 different ones by now.


• How can the music director for City Hunter be the same music director who gave us the "ALMOST PAAAAARADISE!!" from Boys Over Flowers?


• Is it really that difficult finding pants to fit Lee Min Ho? Why do none of them ever go past his ankles? The stylists must love Tian-pants fashion.


• On the subject of LMH's wardrobe, why do his stylists dress him up in the most flamboyant clothes ever? Pink pants? Low cut T-shirts? Jackets with freakin' TASSLES? Oh well, I guess it's a good thing he can pull off everything. He's probably the only guy in the world who can make leopard print pants look good.


• HOW does Lee Min Ho manage to look good in EVERY SINGLE SCREENSHOT? This shouldn't be physically possible. It defies the laws of man. Whether its low angle or high angle, he makes it look good. I betcha if you took a picture of him yawning or sneezing it would still be magazine-cover worthy.


• & last but definitely not least, WHY CAN'T I STOP LOOKING AT LEE MIN HO'S LIPS. Or his cheekbones. Or his nose. Or his eyes... and oh god, those eyes are so beautiful.

Eat Sleep Study has become my mantra these days. Kind of like that Julia Roberts movie, but not quite. It is now day two of my internet diet and OH LORD I CANNOT STAND THIS. But I will endure. For the sake of my HSC mark. It will take a miracle to do well in the History Extension exam but I am determined to try. Tomorrow, I will print out a picture of Lee Min Ho and stick it on my wall because LMH is my motivation. Everytime I look at him, his voice will resonate in my head with something like, "You can do this Cynthia. I believe in you. Don't I look gorgeous in these pink pants?"

Okay, that totally doesn't make sense but I guess what I'm trying to say is that Lee Min Ho = hawtness = unattainable perfection = the drive to be perfect = me being motivated to be perfect. Um, okay that doesn't make sense either. WHATEVER. Ultimately, it all comes down to Lee Min Ho's hotness. End of Story.

Dude, give me a break okay? I just spent 3-4 hours studying history extension. I thought I was doing pretty well.... until I went online and read exemplar responses. And then my self-confidence hit a record low and my brain spontaneously combusted from the sheer level of ineptitude-edness. *cry* :'(

1. I will be in bed by 11 o' clock every night. None of this "aww, I'll just read for another half an hour" because I will end up totally regretting it in the morning when I can't wake up at 7:20.


2. Every day, I will get a maximum of HALF AN HOUR to do all my procrastinating/daily internet rounds. In that half an hour I can: check facebook, check subscriptions on youtube, eatyourkimchi.com, blog, mockingjay.net, lazylaces and check dramabeans. No more checking my facebook page while doing my work or taking a few minutes to watch youtube videos because those few minutes will surely turn into an hour, and then another hour, and then another hour, and you get the point.


3. NO MORE DRAMA-ING ON WEEKDAYS. Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. I don't know how to survive this, seeing as I spent the last two weeks watching korean dramas non-stop. But it's ok. The amount of work I do on weekdays will ensure that I have no work to do on the weekends. It's ok. I got this man, I got this.

I don't know how long I'll be able to abide by these laws but I am determined. Seriously determined. Time to pull up my socks and start preparing for HSC trials. HUZZAH.

Just got a "relax, don't try so hard at school" speech from my mum this morning. She basically said stuff like "you don't always have to push yourself so hard to study and get high marks. There are other ways to get into uni. Always remember to take it easy and make time to go out with your friends and have fun." LOL.

Obviously, my parents need lessons on "How to be an Asian Parent"

Ewww I have tutor today.

YUCKITY YUCK YUCK YUCKITY YUCK YUCKITY YUCKITY YUCKITY YUCK YUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK.

No words can describe how much I hate tutor. The only thing I hate more in this world is probably my driving instructor, and that's saying a lot.

Oh God, those Gu Jun Pyo days were truly horrible, weren't they? THAT PERM! OMGLOLOL. But that was his break-out role I guess. Man, those Boys Over Flowers day sure were memorable... crazy fanatic fanbase, kdrama exposure,a Lee Min Ho cult....

I don't know why but these holidays have felt like being in a waiting room. What I've been waiting for, I'm not exactly sure but there has definitely been a sense of ....non-accomplishment? I don't know the exact word for it but I just haven't felt fulfilled. Maybe it's because during the whole holidays, I've felt a sense of dread about the HSC trials. I feel like, once I've done that, and then the actual HSC, then I can enjoy myself. Only when I watch Shitty Hunter do I feel like I can escape from all that. ITS SO GAY. If I feel like this now, how will I feel next year?

I was talking to Leanne yesterday and we were talking about how much studying we did in the holidays. She's does, freaking FIVE HOURS every day in te holidays. I only fit in about 3 hours per day (and only if it's a good day). But then again, I only have 2 subjects lol. Ah well... And then we started discussing Harry Potter and how our lives are so purposeless right now. But Snez pointed out that we still have The Hunger Games to look forward to... ~OMG REVELATION~. So it's all good. But to be honest, I don't think anything could ever fill the void of Harry Potter - not even my precious Peeta or, though I hate to admit it, Lee Min Ho.

Okay, back to studying The Fundamental Causes of World War I and The Importance of Ludendorff's Spring Offensive and the Allied Response. CYNTHIA, FIGHTING!!! *fist pump*

Went downstairs to look for my Harry Potter book and came back up with cookies instead - forgetting said HP book. Does that ever happen to you? You go somewhere to get something and then come back with something else. Maybe I'm one of those people who get distracted by the "Oooh, shiny". That would explain why I'm such a bad driver. WAIT A MINUTE. What am I talking about? I'm not a bad driver. It's just that my driving instructor is a dickweed.

I seem to have missed out Number 14 down there on my list. So I'll just include it here.

After a while, exhausted and drained, Harry found himself sitting on a bench beside Luna.
"I'd want some peace and quiet, if it were me," she said.
"I'd love some," he replied.
"I'll distract them all," she said. "Use your cloak."
And before he could say a word she had cried. "Ooooh, look, a Blibbering Humdinger!" and pointed out of the window. Everyone who heard looked around, and Harry slide the Cloak up over himself, and got to his feet.

Luna is the embodiment of epic-tuosity, no?

Also known as, Eighteen Instances in which the Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 Movie has Failed the Book By Not Including a Much Loved Fact or Line. (I do like the movie though. I just wish they would include those little details that make the books so epic.)

1. "...with a bright white flash and a crack, a crystal ball fell on the top of Greyback's head and he crumpled to the ground and did not move. "I have more!" shrieked Professor Trelawney from over the banisters... and with a movement like a tennis serve, she heaved another enormous crystal sphere from her bag, waved her want througth the air, and caused the ball to speed across the hall and smash through a window..."

Hehe, I would've loved to see the quirky Professor Trelawney start smashing crystal balls into the baddies. Especially since she always seems so out of it.

2. "He did not recognise the room at all. It was enormous, and looked rather like the interior of a particularly sumptuous tree house...multicoloured hammocks were strung from the ceiling... and windowless walls were covered in bright tapestry hangings. Harry saw the gold Griffindor lion, emblazoned on scarlet, the black badger of Hufflepuff, set against the yellow, and the bronze eagle of Ravenclaw, on blue. The silver and green of Slytherin alone were absent."

Colour!!! T_T The movies are so colourless and drab. Sometimes I wish the director would just stop making the whole thing so utterly depressing. Hogwarts should be colourful!!!

3. "Cho spoke again, "If you'd like to see what the diadem's supposed to look like, I could take you up to the common room and show you, Harry?" Cho had got to her feet, but Ginny said rather fiercely, "No, Luna will take Harry, won't you, Luna?" "Ooooh, yes, I'd like to," said Luna happily, and Cho sat down again, looking dissapointed."

LOLs.

4. "The deserted Ravenclaw common room was a wide, circular room, airier than any Harry had ever seen at Hogwarts. Graceful arched windows punctuated the walls, which were hung with blue and bronze silks: by day, the Ravenclaws would have a spectacular view of trhe surrounding mountains. The ceiling was domed and painted with stars, which were echoed in the midnight-blue carpet. There were tables, chairs and bookcases, and in a niche opposite the door stood a tall statue of white marble."

I was so looking forward to seeing the Ravenclaw common room :'( If I went to Hogwarts, I would have liked to be in Ravenclaw. You know how Griffindor has the fat lady to guard their common room? For Ravenclaw, they have to answer a riddle. ISN'T THAT SO AWESOME?

5. "Hermione sat panting on the floor beside Goyle, who was still unconscious. "C - Crabbe," choked Malfoy, as soon as he could speak. "C- Crabbe..." "He's dead," said Ron harshly.

I know Crabbe died suddenly in the movie but couldn't they have shown Malfoy suffering about it? Crabbe got one quick glance and that's all. Keep in mind that Crabbe and Goyle have been with Malfoy since the FIRST movie.

6. "Hello Minister!" bellowed Percy, sending a neat jinx straight at Thicknesse, who dropped his wand and clawed at the front of his robes, apparently in awful discomfort. "Did I mention I'm resigning?"

7. "No - no - no!" someone was shouting. "No! Fred! No!" And Percy was shaking his brother, and Ron was kneeling beside them, and Fred's eyes stared without seeing, the ghost of his last laugh still etched upon his face."

They never showed how Fred died in battle. Or how Lupin and Tonks died too. That's not fair. Those characters deserved some sort of last glory shot of them fighting Death Eaters before they died or something.

8. "Even as they stood braced, looking for the opportunity to act, there came a great "wheeeeeeeeee!" and, looking up, Harry saw Peeves zooming over them, dropping Snargaluff pods down on to the Death Eaters, whose heads were suddenly engulfed in wriggling, green tubers like fat worms."

LOL that would've been cool to see.

9. "I'm Draco Malfoy, I'm Draco, I'm on your side!" Draco was on the upper landing, pleading with another masked Death Eater. Harry stunned the Death Eater as they passed: Malfoy looked around, beaming, for his saviour, and Ron punched him from under the Cloak. Malfoy fell backwards on top of the Death Eater, his mouth bleeding, utterly bemused. "And that's the second time we've saved your life tonight, you two-faced bastard!" Ron yelled."

I repeat. That would've been cool to see.

10. "Somewhere in the distance they could hear Peeves zooming through the corridors singing a victory song of his own composition: "We did it, we bashed them, wee Potter's the One, And Voldy's gone mouldy, so now let's have fun!" "Really gives a feeling for the scope and tragedy of the thing, doesn't it?" said Ron, pushing open a door to let Harry and Hermione through."

11. "Any moment, the people for whom he had tried to die would see him, lying apparently dead, in Hagrid's arms. "NO!!" The scream was the more terrible because he had never expected or dreamed that Professor McGonagall could make such a sound. He heard another woman laughing nearby, and knew that Bellatrix gloried in McGonagall's despair."

No one really reacted to Harry's death (with the exception of Ginny). In the book, it was way more traumatic as all of Harry's friends and the people of Hogwarts saw his "dead" body in Hagrid's arms. I don't think they did that really well in the movie.

City Hunter is so satisfying. Hits me in all the right places, it does. Kind of like a frozen coke after doing a 4km run. Or the feeling you get after killing off all the green pigs in Angry Birds. Perhaps even as satisfying as the words "squelch" and "moist". Although I learnt from TMZ that "moist" makes a lot of people cringe. "moist" hehehehehe. MOIST.

Teehee, that's Eva Longoria from Desperate Housewives. And look what she's holding in her hand :D

Self control? Pfffff. I have none.

P.P.S. Someone please tell the koreans that City Hunter is pronouned Ci-ty Hun-ter. Not Shit-ty Hun-ter.