I wish I could say I was different from everybody else and not worried about the future (because atm it seems to be a trend to blog about how screwed up your life is), but I'm not. I am exactly like everyone else cause I have no fucking idea what to do with myself.

Journalism is officially out of the question. After hearing all that stuff on the news about the budget cuts and Fairfax closing down, I'm pretty sure only a really brave or really stupid person would choose to do a course on journalism. There's not going to be a "Sydney Morning Herald" anymore. Media industries are closing down and firing thousands because everyone would rather get their news online. By the time I get out of Uni and start looking for a job, there will be very few newspapers left. I'm not mad at the world for changing. It'll be stupid to argue that technology is ruining our lives when it's obviously given us back so much more. But a small part of me just wonders why I couldn't have been born like, two decades ago.

Speaking of technology, I went to see Mr M today to get feedback for my major work. I was basically told that I had to rewrite 80% of it cause it was bad/irrelevant/boring and basically not of a good quality. In my head, I was thinking, "You tell me this now?? Especially when you could have said something like 5 weeks ago when I sent you that draft? I spent the last few weeks fixing up the wrong parts and doing the wrong things instead of dedicating time to my other subjects and now I get told that it was all irrelevant anyway." Then I felt mad at myself because I realised how petty I was being. He was only doing his job. Good teachers give feedback - no matter how painful it'll sound.

That didn't change the fact that I felt like doing this with my major work:

So then I went back to the group and moped about life. I moped about the upcoming trials and how instead of dedicating my time to studying and organizing notes/related texts/doing practice essays, I would be rewriting my major work during the holidays. I moped about the future and how I was so sick of hearing people say that my life was easy because I could do anything I wanted to and succeed. It's not easy. Especially when the areas you're interested in have very very very low job stability. After periods 4 & 5 I went home and continued moping. I forced myself to read the comments on the major work (because I knew it wasn't going to be any less painful than reading it a week later) and then spent half an hour wondering why I just did that when it'd made me feel about 10 times worse. And now I'm moping on my blog. God, I'm so pathetic.