I am trying to limit the amount of time I spend procrastinating on the net so I'm gonna limit this post to 15 minutes.

There seems to be a lull in the amount of homework I'm getting from school. I didn't get any big assessment tasks last week (which is rare) so I took advantage of it by doing the-project-that-shall-not-be-named. I'm just gonna talk about the You-know-what for now. The-project-that-shall-not-be-named is the quite possibly the one thing that has depressed me throughout the whole year. If boggarts existed, my one would take on the form of this project. It's worth a whopping 80% of my course mark for history extension which is probably why I can't bring myself start writing it. I've worked on it on and off for the last 5 months but it feels like I've gotten ABSOLUTELY NOWHERE. It sits here on my desk, taunting me. When I look at it I feel depressed. When I work on it, I feel depressed because none of my research will help in my essay. When I don't work on it, I feel even more depressed because of the lack of progress.

I wish I could burn it. I miss having that feeling of "hey, there are no more projects/assessments to do! I'll just take advantage of this and go have some free time to do the things I love." I NEVER get that feeling anymore because there's always a voice in the back of my mind saying, "Well if you don't have any more assessments, why don't you work on the project? Just in case you get more assignments in the future and you don't have anymore time." Do you know what I mean? It's that fear of not doing anything productive with your time.

But I think time's running out. A draft has to be handed in 5 weeks time and I haven't even finished researching. Five weeks does seem like a long time but I know for a fact that I'm gonna be getting more assessments in the weeks to come. How will I cope then?

Another issue that's been stressing me out is 4 unit maths. I can't believe I have to make a decision about that so soon. At the beginning of the year, I was dead set on not doing it but the more people keep asking me about it, the more unsure I become. There is a 96.7% chance that I won't be able to cope with it. Just thinking about the extra time + homework load that will have to be dedicated to it is enough to make me cry. So many people have emphasized the difficulty of the topic. And to be honest, I don't even have a maths brain - I only do a lot of it. Oh the curse of being asian. LOL, jks. But then again, it feels like a waste to not at least give it a try. I mean, I slaved away at tutor all those years in those accelerated classes and for what? It seems like such a waste of effort.

Oh noes, my fifteen minutes is up. I'm sorry for the extremely boring post. Congratz if you even managed to get through it LOL. Anyways, I'm gonna get back to doing maths homework. SIGH.