Today I discovered a new favourite blogger. This guy is a book blogger who posts reviews of every chapter of every book he reads. So far, he's covered the whole Harry Potter series, the whole Twilight series and right now, he's doing the Hunger Games series.
I started reading his chapter reviews on the Hunger Games and his commentary on it is pretty funny and informative - even though I've already read the series. And then I click on his "Mark Reads Twilight" reviews and his whole tone changes.
He HATES the series. Like absolutely HATES it. All his reviews each chapter of Twilight sounds something like:
I started reading his chapter reviews on the Hunger Games and his commentary on it is pretty funny and informative - even though I've already read the series. And then I click on his "Mark Reads Twilight" reviews and his whole tone changes.
He HATES the series. Like absolutely HATES it. All his reviews each chapter of Twilight sounds something like:
Chapter 1:In which I regrettably begin to read Twilight and it’s clear I’m going to hate every moment of this...
Chapter 2:In which Mark realizes very early how unrealistic and creepy this book is by the second chapter...
Chapter 7:In which Mark declares this book as the very worst book ever almost entirely based on how Bella surfs the Internet, and then learns that she gets emo over Linkin Park. This is AWFUL...
Chapter 12:In which Mark reviews the entire chapter using only two images...Until it ends with:
Mark Finishes Twilight – In which Mark decides he cannot live in a household with these four books still existing in it, so he hides them all around Los Angeles with notations to read this very blog. Again, sometimes I’m too clever for my own good. Oh well. As far as I know, no one has ever found the books and contacted me about them. Maybe I’ll never know what happened to them.
Amazingly, he actually finishes reading the whole series and blogs about every chapter of every single book. I know you'll all groan when I say this but usually, I don't really like hearing about all the hate Twilight has gotten. DON'T JUDGE ME OK? But really, it's gotten to the point where the only thing that people hate more in the world is Justin Bieber. LOL I even remember writing a blog post stating "The Reasons Why Everyone Hates Twilight".
I read Twilight back in Year 6 and actually, I really liked it. That was back when no-one knew what Twilight was. Then there was the phase where EVERYONE loved Twilight and you would see girls carrying copies around at school etc. Now its gone to the "IF YOU LOVE TWILIGHT WE WILL COME KILL YOU IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT AND DUMP YOUR BODY IN PROSPECT CREEK" stage. But seriously, do people have to hate so much? ITS JUST A BOOK FOR GOD'S SAKE. I know the themes and characters piss people off but c'mon. No one's forcing anyone to read it. But I guess it can't be helped that Twilight is synonymous with "screaming 15 year olds who love Robert Pattinson". I swear, the movie gets more exposure than the book does.
But I digress.
I've gone WAYYY off topic. What I wanted to say was despite all my disapproval towards the Twilight hate, I TOTALLY LOVE THIS GUY'S REVIEWS. Seriously, for Chapter 12 of Eclipse he got sick of writing about it and decided to only comment on the chapter using Mean Girls quotes.
e.g:
Here's that specific page is you're interested: http://markreadstwilight.buzznet.com/user/journal/5285001/mark-reads-eclipse-chapter-12/
And here's Mark's collection of all his twilight reviews: http://markreads.net/reviews/2010/11/complete-mark-reads-twilight-archive/
I read Twilight back in Year 6 and actually, I really liked it. That was back when no-one knew what Twilight was. Then there was the phase where EVERYONE loved Twilight and you would see girls carrying copies around at school etc. Now its gone to the "IF YOU LOVE TWILIGHT WE WILL COME KILL YOU IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT AND DUMP YOUR BODY IN PROSPECT CREEK" stage. But seriously, do people have to hate so much? ITS JUST A BOOK FOR GOD'S SAKE. I know the themes and characters piss people off but c'mon. No one's forcing anyone to read it. But I guess it can't be helped that Twilight is synonymous with "screaming 15 year olds who love Robert Pattinson". I swear, the movie gets more exposure than the book does.
But I digress.
I've gone WAYYY off topic. What I wanted to say was despite all my disapproval towards the Twilight hate, I TOTALLY LOVE THIS GUY'S REVIEWS. Seriously, for Chapter 12 of Eclipse he got sick of writing about it and decided to only comment on the chapter using Mean Girls quotes.
e.g:
■Alice: "Don't be a baby about this. No tantrums."
Boo, you whore.
■"So you're--I mean we're--having a graduation party. It's no big thing. Nothing to freak out over. But I saw you would freak out if I tried to make it a surprise party"--she danced out of the way as Edward reached over to muss her hair--"and Edward said I had to tell you. But it's nothing. I promise."
She thinks she's gonna have a party and invite me? Who does she think she is? I like INVENTED her, you know what I mean?
■"But on the other hand," he countered, "you will soon be leaving time altogether. So why should the transitory customs of one local culture affect the decision so much?"
It's true. At your age, Bella, you're going to have a lot of urges. You're going to want to take off your clothes and touch Edward. But if you do touch him, you WILL get chlamydia. And die.
& my favourite:
■"So your condition...?"
"Is still in effect. I do see your point, Bella, but if you want me to change you myself..."
"Dum, dum, dah-dum," I hummed under my breath. I was going for the wedding march, but it sort of sounded like a dirge.
Why should Edward just get to stomp around like a giant while the rest of us try not to get smushed under his big feet? Bella is just as cute as Edward, right? Bella is just as smart as Edward, people totally like Bella just as much as they like Edward, and when did it become okay for one person to be the boss of everybody because that's not what
Rome is about! We should totally just STAB EDWARD!
Here's that specific page is you're interested: http://markreadstwilight.buzznet.com/user/journal/5285001/mark-reads-eclipse-chapter-12/
And here's Mark's collection of all his twilight reviews: http://markreads.net/reviews/2010/11/complete-mark-reads-twilight-archive/
